The Difficulties of Child Arrangements During Christmas

Now that the holiday season approaches, children Christmas arrangements can be very difficult and stressful, especially for families that are newly divorced parents or separated.

When your children live between two homes, there can be a lot of conflict during handovers and Christmas is even harder on both parents as well as the child, and their need to spend time with both families 

Even if there are practical arrangements for handovers, this can sometimes be an afterthought, especially when there’s been a lot of work going into agreeing the time the child spends with each parent. 

Although some agreements and circumstances will not work for your specific situation, you could split three Christmas days in half or Christmas Eve with one parent Christmas morning with another parent in the afternoon or perhaps a midday change over or festive period. perhaps the children could have a say on whether they wish to spend Christmas Day or Boxing Day with the other parents and the same for New Year, this would be depending on their age. 

As we know most school holidays are around the average of two weeks long, so perhaps parents could agree that the children will spend one week with one parent and the second with the other. Also, you can have agreements that you can have Christmas Day alternated each year.

The Family Law Act 1996 states that the needs of the children to see both parents is more important than any negative emotions that you may feel about children spending time at Christmas with each other. However, once you have agreed on arrangements, you should be positive and informative to each other and the children.

Both parents should ensure the children’s well-being takes precedence over any personal disagreements or animosity. There needs to be a focus on creating a sense of stability and consistency for them, even if this means compromising

If you are still struggling with agreements, then you can try family mediation, or you could make an application to the court for a child arrangements order.

A child arrangements order (CAO) is a legal agreement that regulates where a child lives, who they spend time with, and when they can have contact with others:

• Where the child lives
• When the child spends time with each parent
• When and what other types of contact take place

CAO’s are usually sought after a relationship breakdown and replace “contact orders” and “residence orders”. They are made by the family court and are based on the circumstances of the individual family and what is in the best interests of the child.

Section 8 of the Children Act 1989 gives the courts power to issue orders to regulate arrangements for a child’s living and contact arrangements.

BULAC offers free legal advice on child arrangement orders. If you would like an appointment please call 01248 388411 or email bulac@bangor.ac.uk